Reprieve

The surgery on my knee helped relieve enough of the pain that I could reduce my use of crutches and get by with a walking stick for the most part. Two weeks ago, I had a cortisone shot to help with the pain that still plagues me. After the initial reaction to the shot in which I felt terrible, I found significant relief. I started sleeping through the night. I was finally warm, something that I have struggled with since I got hurt. I was able to walk, and it was as though a fog had lifted and I could do more than just get by. 

We went out on a date.  I went to the grocery store. I cooked. I went for walks. I walked up stairs. I could do so many of the things that I hadn't been able to do. Life reawakened for me. I started to make plans for the future.

So imagine the disappointment of the shot wearing off quickly. I followed through with my plans to cook and bake over the weekend, but the price was high. I miss being able to enjoy life so much.

I'd like to adapt my home, yard and life to better accommodate what I now know is going to be a lifetime problem. The short break from the pain made me realize that if I'm going to have any sort of quality of life I need to change things. 

So how do I do that? How do I make everything more accessible when I teeter on the brink of losing everything? How do I afford the supplies to make my yard and garden more workable and productive, when I can't afford household supplies? How do I make things change when I can't physically do as much?

I don't know the answers. I don't know how to make everything better.